The Sex Addict: Tortured Soul or Just Slutty?

If you haven't been living under a rock lately you may have noticed that international golf pro and billionaire Tiger Woods is being treated for sexual addiction, as if he doesn't have enough problems already! (note the sarcasm) It seems like these days anytime a famous man wants to get away with infidelity he claims sexual addiction. Perhaps this is a way to spin the media, as to not tarnish their image too much, or maybe it will make his wife blame him less, or maybe he actually does have a problem...but last time I checked Satyriasis (that's the fancy term for male sex addict) was a relatively rare condition. So why is it now popping up all over the place? Is the growing number of "sex addicts" in this country due to our hyper-sexualized society? Is it a chemical imbalance caused by too many hormones in the meat? Or are people using it as an excuse just to be really slutty?

Now I personally believe that we are all addicts at heart. Some addictions are more harmful than others (drugs and alcohol) and some are more socially acceptable (shopping or exercising). What ever it is, we all have at least one thing in our lives we just can't get enough of. Something we would have a very hard time living with out. I myself,come from a long line of addicts. I am Irish and Russian after all (Have you met my two good friends Whiskey and Vodka?). So I know what it's like to try and keep those vices in check. And while there have been times where I have over indulged (cough*cough*college*cough);I have never had to go to rehab, never woke up next to a stranger and I've never been arrested. I have always keep my addictions under control, I have always been able to stop. Haven't I?

I have always been a very sexual person. I like to engage in frequent sexual activity in a variety of styles and places. It's fun, relieves stress and is great exercise! Sure a few people have called me a slut or a nympho, but I always shrugged it off, blaming their sexual repressed narrow minds or jealous fervor. But when I really thought about my life's sexual history, I realized that I haven't gone a prolonged period of time without sexual activity since I was a adolescent teen girl discovering masturbation.

The longest I have gone with out actual sex, since I lost my virginity at 16, was the 5 months. Even then I had a plethora of pornographic materials, toys and even some skype sex (that would be naughty web camera fun with my boyfriend for those who don't know). Even with all those other methods of sexual gratification it was the most frustrating 5 months of my life. To quote Elvis "I was itchin like a man on a fuzzy tree." Is all this evidence enough to make me a 'gasp' sex addict?

My curiosity lead me to one of the only places you can get your vice and your virtue in the same place, and with only a few clicks of a mouse...THE INTERNET! With the growing number of people claiming sex addiction, there were dozens of sights for sex addicts. Some claiming they're liars, some offering them help and even some cheering them on. I finally settled on www.sexhelp.com. They offered an online 45 question test to determine whether or not you are in fact, a sex addict.

Some of the questions I felt were valid, like number 13. "Have you felt degraded by your sexual behaviors?" Some question I though were ridiculous, like number 39."Have you regularly engaged in sadomasochistic behavior?" (Hello! Liking S&M does not make anyone a sex addict!) And some questions I just thought were funny, like number 44. "Has your sexual behavior put you at risk for arrest for lewd conduct or public indecency?" (LOL, There was that one time at Volcano National Park....) After I completed my quiz I anxiously clicked ahead for my results and low and behold, on a scale from 0-20 I ranked a 13! According to sexhelp.com, I "HAVE MET a score on basis of the six criteria that indicate sex addiction is present." Then they showed me a handy little graph!



Looks like thirteen is right at the top of normal non-addict sexuality or almost at the top of the sex addict peek. I'm not sure which, depends on those unknown confusing side numbers...Contrary to sexhelp.com and some other popular beliefs, I am not a sex addict. Sex doesn't make me unhappy or interfere with my work or personal life. I might like it a lot but sex is not in control of me. Even though I am not a sex addict,I can imagine how it must feel to derive no satisfaction from sexual activity.

For one month in the summer of 2006, I lost my orgasm. I don't know where it went or why, but nothing I did with myself or anyone else was giving me that sweet release. The longer I went not being able to get to The Big O, the more often and harder I tried. I was starting to get pretty sore when I ended my streak and was finally able to climax 25,000 feet up, flying solo in an airplane bathroom. If the agony I felt during those long 4 weeks is how sex addicts feel their whole lives, I don't know how they keep from jumping off a bridge.

Sexual Addiction is a real disorder that can have devastating consequences on a persons physical and emotional health. People who truly have a sexual addiction, engage in compulsory sexual behavior (regardless of risk), but experience no joy or relief from it. In fact they often feel the exacted opposite. After they engage in their sexual behavior of choice (be it masturbation, sex, or even just looking at porn) they often feel empty, depressed or ashamed. They deserve all the help they can get, but they still need to take responsibility for themselves and what they do. If you believe you might be addicted to sex and it is ruining you're life, I urge you to speak with a counselor or psychologist about your problems.

So here we come back to Tiger. Oh Tiger, why did it take your mistresses coming forward for you to get help if it was what you needed? Why did you get married if you felt your need for sex with multiple partners on multiple occasions was so strong? Could it be that maybe this wasn't a problem in your life till you got famous and rich? Maybe then this isn't a problem of sexual addiction and maybe more the case of a nerdy kid finally getting the money and fame enough to be as slutty as he always wanted to be.

I guess my point is that people shouldn't use sex addiction as an excuse, it's a real disorder that causes the people who really have it, real problems. Come on Tiger! Man up and tell the truth! "Now I am rich and can sleep with a lot of hot bitches, so I do!" There is nothing wrong with being slutty Tiger, accept and love yourself for you are! I wanna hear you say it! I am a proud slutty golfer man! If Nike and your other sponsors don't like it, screw em. You're a billionaire! You have enough money to be able to bang gorgeous gold diggers for several human lifetimes. Mozeltov baby and enjoy your sauce!